Before You Accuse Me
by Angeepang
Summary: Oneshot “Have you tried the firewhiskey? It’s delicious and warms up your throat and makes you tingly all over!” Granger said before throwing back her, was it fifth or sixth drink? Draco had lost count and sipped his butterbeer.


**Disclaimer: J.K. Rowling's world, not mine.**

* * *

Draco was getting annoyed. Strike that. He was already annoyed. Past the point of annoyed, actually. Granger had been having a blast. He had never seen her this way before; _drunk_, that is. It was entirely Draco's fault; he could take most of the credit for her current state. He was the one who convinced Granger that she needed to let go and have fun once in a while. And he was the one who thought it would be a good idea to go out and celebrate their promotion (the two of them put together made the top Auror team the Wizarding World had seen since Frank and Alice Longbottom. Sure being an Auror wasn't on the top of Draco's list of career choices, but it was better than being thrown into Azkaban after all). 

Granger was hesitant at first but Draco convinced her that they needed, nay, _deserved _a fun night out. But Granger was far too responsible for such frivolity, and Draco finally convinced her by offering to be designated Apparator for the evening.

And that's the reason Draco sat at some club in Godric's Hollow in a very agitated state.

* * *

"Malfoy! Have you tried the firewhiskey? It's delicious and warms up your throat and makes you tingly all over!" Granger said before throwing back her, _was it fifth or sixth drink_? Draco didn't bother keeping track. 

"I'm fine with my butterbeer Granger."

"My lips are hot! Can you imagine that!"

"That's something, isn't it Granger?" he said rolling his eyes at her.

"Oh my God!" Granger screamed. "I love this song!" she exclaimed, jumping up and down as some Weird Sisters song came on. "Come dance with me partner!"

"I think I'll stay here, Granger."

"Fine, suit yourself Mr. Party Pooper."

Granger made her way out to the dance floor. Draco couldn't help but be amused at Granger's antics. She was "dancing", if you could call it that. Granger had run out to the middle of the dance floor, thrown her hands up over her head, and wriggled her butt around whilst yelling, "Whoo hoo!". _And she thought it was sexy_. She was attracting so much attention that a circle had actually formed around her, and people were encouraging her. Of course, they were all drunk too. _Morons_, Draco thought. Okay, so maybe he wasn't having a terrible time per se, but that wasn't the point. He was supposed be celebrating too! At least Granger was having enough fun for the both of them.

After three more of her "favorite song ever", Granger came back to the bar where Draco had been sitting. Her face was very red and she looked hot (_no, not in that way! This is Granger!_) from being out on the dance floor for nearly twenty minutes and ordered another drink.

"Don't you think you've had enough, Granger?" Draco asked her. It was difficult dealing with Granger when she was sober. Drunk Granger probably wouldn't be the most cooperative person in the world.

"I'll tell you when I've had enough mister!" Granger told him before she downed half her glass. "Hey bartender! I've been cheated! You cheating, cheating man! Cheaters never win, didn't your mother teach you that!" Granger yelled. Thankfully, Draco got her to shut up before the bartender, a very large, broad man named Howie, could hear her accusations.

"Granger, what do you mean you've been cheated?" Draco asked patiently.

"He didn't put any alcohol in this! I can't taste any whiskey!" Draco sighed.

"That's probably because you've had so much whiskey you can't taste it anymore."

"I don't think that's true. I think that _bum _over there is trying to run a scam on me. Well he decided to mess with the wrong witch tonight!"

"Granger."

"What! You don't think I can take him? He may be a lot bigger than me, but I'm spry!"

"Now Granger, we both know you can kick the crap out of that guy," he played along.

"That's right," she reinforced.

"Do you really think it's worth it though? I mean, look at where _he_ is in life, and look at where _you _are," Draco said, trying to reason with her.

"I suppose it would be mean to beat him up. Especially in front of so many people," she said nodding her head.

"Alright Granger, I think we've have enough of this place. Why don't we go back to your flat?"

"I don't think so mister. You're not getting into my panties that easily," Granger said.

"Fine, how about we just go for a walk then? The air might do you some good." Draco told her. No use in arguing over the fact that he definitely wasn't trying to get into her panties.

"Okie dokie," Granger said. "Wait a minute!" Granger yelled as she dove under Draco's chair.

"Granger, what in the hell are you doing now?" Draco asked, very annoyed.

"I can't find my purse!" Hermione shouted as she crawled around the floor. He sighed and picked up the bag that had been hanging from the back of his chair all night.

"Granger, it's right here."

"You found it, yay!" Hermione said as she put the bag over her shoulder. Draco grabbed her hand tightly so as not to lose her in the crowd of people as they made their way to the exit.

* * *

It was dark when they got outside, but the moon was giving off enough light so that Draco was able to lead Granger back to her place. It was a really nice night out, thankfully, though a bit chilly. 

"You okay, Granger?" Draco asked. He couldn't let his partner get sick. If Hermione woke up the next morning with anything (other than an enormous hangover) Draco was sure to get blamed.

"I'm super, thanks for asking." _Patience is a virtue_. Draco kept on telling himself that. Beside, more than once Granger had brought home him home in a drunken state. He owed it to her, and Draco Malfoy was nothing if not a man of his word. He stopped abruptly and let go of Grangers hand. He took off his jacket and helped her put it on. She was a _helpless _drunk. Once his jacket was on, he grabbed her hand again and led her back down the street. As he walked, he noticed Granger looking at him. _Staring _at him with this weird smile on her face.

"What is it, Granger?" he asked but didn't bother to stop.

"It's just," she said coming to a halt and making Draco jerk back. "I love you Malfoy. I really do." _Oh Merlin, was she three sheets to the wind_. Draco said nothing until Granger started crying. "I mean it! You're a good partner. And you always have my back. And I know we fight, but at the end of the day, it's all coming from a good place!"

"Er, thanks Granger," what could he say? Crying women made him uncomfortable. Draco never knew what to do. And this wasn't just _any _woman crying, this was Hermione Granger. "Come on, let's get you home."

"Oh no. I told you, you're not getting into my panties!"

"I know, I know," he said grabbing her hand and once again pulling her down the street. _Why did she always have to accuse him of trying to sleep with her_! He should have just led her to the Apparation point when they left the bar instead of walking back to her flat.

"Wait a minute, Malfoy!" Granger shouted as she once again stopped. "Why can't I walk properly?" she said out loud to no one in particular, looking down at her feet.

"Because you're drunk, Granger."

"No, that's not it," she told him, as if the idea had been completely crazy. With this, Granger bent down and started fussing around with her shoes.

"What are you doing?" he asked her.

"These shoes!" Granger said as she fumbled with them. By now, she was sitting on the ground, in the middle of the night, wearing Draco's jacket. while trying to get her shoes off. As if it was the shoes' fault she couldn't walk. Another lesson Draco learned: a drunk Granger was not a coordinated Granger. Draco had to eventually take the damn things off for her.

* * *

Ten minutes later, Draco was carrying Granger on his back. She had roped him into that one, complaining about the temperature of the ground. Apparently, it was far too cold for her bare feet, and she would indeed get frost bite (in the _beginning of October _mind you). They would need to be amputated (how she could use the word amputate properly but not walk in a straight line perplexed Draco to no end). She wouldn't be able to walk properly (how she would manage to walk without feet, Draco wasn't about to ask) and she would have to quit her job, and Draco would miss her far too much. That was her explanation at least, and Draco was in no mood to argue with her. 

It was much easier piggybacking Granger, and Draco got them both back to her flat not long after. Of course, Granger had been rattling in his ear the whole time about house elves, but he just tuned her out for that. Draco unlocked the door and carried Granger inside her flat.

* * *

"Home sweet home!" she yelled as she jumped off Draco's back and stumbled onto the floor. He rolled his eyes and shook his head as he made his way into her bathroom. When he came out, Granger was still on the floor nuzzling up to that cat of hers. Draco would never admit it to anyone, but he actually had a soft spot for that mangey thing. Crookshanks was the only cat Draco ever managed to get along with. He crouched down to them. 

"Granger?" he whispered.

"What?" She sounded exhausted, but continued to stroke Crookshanks.

"Don't you want to go to bed?" he asked her.

"I _am _in bed, Malfoy. Why are you in my bedroom?" He sighed and picked up Crookshanks and set him down on the couch. He shook his head as the feline watched Draco pick up his owner and followed the two of them. Draco brought Granger into her bedroom and put her in bed. He pulled the covers up over her just as Crookshanks jumped onto the bed. Draco couldn't help but smile at the cat. He gave Draco that "thanks for bringing her home, but I can take it from here" look, as he snuggled close to her. Draco could hear Crookshanks purring as he closed the door to Granger's room.

* * *

Hermione woke up in her nice warm bed with Crookshanks sleeping right next to her. Her mouth was dry and had a horrible taste in her mouth and her head was pounding. How did she end up in bed? Hermione pushed the covers back only to discover she was wearing more clothes than she could remember. Why was she wearing Malfoy's jacket?

* * *

**Author's Note:** And there you have it, another fun one-shot. I tried to keep them in character as best as I could. I liked the idea of Draco looking after Hermione when she's drunk. Deep down, Hermione's like any other girl when she's had one too many, at least that's what I think. Thanks for reading.


End file.
